Since the last post, Sister Pierson and I got a new companion, Sister Wood. She is so great. The two weeks with her in our companionship have been the best on the mission. Sister Wood is a great example of courage and hope. Our last companionship studies together have been mind blowing :)
So I have some fun stories that tie into some deep thoughts:
Last P-day I played touch football with our district. For anyone who knows me well, this is a huge shock because I am deathly afraid of sports. Like. Seriously. :) But It was so incredibly fun. I had no idea what was going on. It was a blast. We are doing it this P-day as well. I am so sad we did not start doing this sooner. I was sooooooooooo sore. For DAYS after. I am so excited. I still don't quite get the rules and I feel like an idiot the whole time, but it's great.
Also, today we had a District meeting/ hike that was super great. It represented the apostasy and there were "clues" or "pieces of truth" that were all spread out along the trail and the further we walked the more scattered. We tried to follow the clues as best as we could according to our knowledge, but sometimes we took wrong turns. It was super symbolic and really fun. After, we all took pictures. Elder Jackson and Elder Bogguss wanted a picture together, so they handed me their camera... and I dropped it. Sorta. The wrist strap detached and the camera fell and shattered into a million pieces. It was awful. Elder
wouldn't even look at me. He was like "all my mission pictures from my
whole mission were saved to that camera!" I felt like dirt, but I was
still like "I DIDN'T DROP IT!! IT FELL APART!!" I was still holding
part of the camera. After about ten minutes of me freaking out and total
awkwardness they finally told me that the camera was already broken and that it
was all a joke. They had pieced it back together. I was so full of emotions of
confusion, guilt, sorrow, more confusion, and surprise I screamed when they
told me. Not might finest moment. But it was really really funny! HA HA HA! Jackson
So. There was a time, not long ago at all, where I was afraid of everything - especially if it had to do with people. For example, team sports, or associating with a group of people. I remember having panic attacks where I forgot how to breathe because there were people around me, wanting to go to parties or do other things but giving in to my fear and staying home. I cried so hard when I found out my dad had been called in the Bishopric of the Young Single Adult Ward and I knew I would have to associate with people. I love people. A lot. I am just afraid of them :) I would look at the scripture that said weak things could become strong in the Lord and hope it could be true. But I never really thought I would improve. My fears, however irrational, were extremely real and - to a certain extent - they controlled me. But I have always tried to push forward and trust in the Lord. I was pondering everything I do on this mission. Teaching, knocking doors, being in charge, having responsibility, building trust with everyone, talking to EVERYONE, having friends who are close enough they convince me that I broke their camera, PLAYING FOOTBALL FOR GOODNESS SAKES. Never did I think that this would be possible. Never. I know the Lord can make my weaknesses strengths. I have seen it. I testify that God is real. He is all powerful, and all loving, and we can trust Him.